Before we dig deep into my thoughts, please read the below definition of a burn out. If you know anyone experiencing the same, please do reach out with a friendly hand for emotional support to whosoever may need and just listen to what they have to say. : )
As per the findings of many psychologists and health experts, burn out is a state of exhaustion be it mental, emotional or physical - due to excessive and prolonged stress.
With Social media (where one may be constantly comparing to other people's lives), increased time spent on work related activities, and attaching work as the primary to one’s sense of identity and self worth are the primary reasons why burn - out is a rapidly increasing epidemic of our times.
As per the Special Issue on Burnout & Health by Wilmar B. Schaufeli & Esther R. Greenglass – “Although burnout is linked to the extensive literature on occupational health, burnout goes beyond occupational health, by focusing on specific stressors in the workplace to emphasize total life and environmental pressures affecting health.”
It is clearly exhausting the people of our times. We , (including me), are all grasping the idea of turning 30+ and unable to overcome the fears of the past, along with driven anxiety for the present and future. As far as I can tell , mostly from the way we have been brought up, we do not have any options but to spear ahead - right ?
That’s what I also had in mind. Until the mental pressure & stress of adulting gave in. As a person who always has had anxiety growing up, I didn't know better ways of coping with the day to day pressures of existence. Feeling anxious is perfectly normal, but when every job and activity starts to give you panic attacks and anxiety - it becomes difficult to manage your daily routines.
People often consider giving up as a weakness, you ought to give up on any situation only when there is an emergency or when you / society considers yourself a failure. Giving up is also looked down as a form of failure. But is it really ?
Our fundamental values of our upbringing are constantly fighting with our new age realizations of today’s modern living. The definition of success keeps changing every year and the measure of one's happiness is different to us all, and not bound by our cars, kids or our lifestyle choices.
The last couple of months , I have been wanting to explore this myself.
Being in the corporate work life for over 13 years and with no boundaries to maintain a healthy work- life balance, I have been exhausted enough times to let my health (both physically and mentally) be repeatedly depleted.
Come to think of it, people have often said that to take a few leaps ahead sometimes it is better to take a few steps behind. This might be a good strategy, I thought. With unknown outcomes , my anxious self was bound to be confused and awake with negativity & pessimism.
For over 12 months my body and mind kept telling me to take a break and rest and relax for the well being of my body. So I decided, with the support of my family, to give up a thriving career in February of this year (2023) - without an action plan for the future and no backup plan !
I had no idea what I would be doing with my time in the coming months or if I would want to rejoin the workforce to again strenuously climb up the corporate ladder.
But I was excited , for the first time in my life , I was looking forward to waking up in the mornings. Without any decisive plan of action or to-do list, I was about to find myself all over again.
As my closest people did not shy away from telling me that I was throwing away the chance of building a dream life which was only a few years away, I thought to myself for the first time that I no longer enjoyed the things and people in my life anyway.
It was time to shut down from the noise all around and focus on what needs to be built and remembered by - for myself. Over the years, I had really forgotten what or who I was, owing to always living up to people’s expectations of me.
So it was necessary to give up and actually sleep. I slept like a baby for the first time in years. Without the stress of getting up and wasting commuting time to the office, I could now enjoy a cup of tea while watching the daily news roundup.
Its been more than 4 months now , and I am still getting used to the idea of not really working towards a specific goal for the first time in my life. But, I know this - I would like to dedicate this time going forward to exploring myself and enjoy being present, both physically and mentally.
It may look like I gave up, but to me personally, it feels like I may just be starting….
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